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pjay toxic shame ??

hey, i sometimes read this one weekly newspaper column by the 'advise goddess' , mainly because i'm curious about different perspectives on the dynamics of relationships. anyways, her response to this guy included a suggested book reading by dr. robert glover called 'no more mr. nice guy'. without going into the whole article, she inferred that maybe this guys problems stemmed from trying too hard to be a people pleaser, being too afraid of his own flaws, & having the bad habit of repressin… Continue

Added by pjay on June 19, 2009 at 4:05am — 7 Comments

Karina Guerra Reflexionemos sobre la verdad #2 acerca de nuestros sueños

"Todo lo que hoy vemos empezó como un sueño"

Cuando lleguen a ti pensamientos como “es sólo un sueño” que actúen en tu contra para detenerte en el camino hacia la conquista del tuyo recuerda que todo lo que ves empezó como un sueño. Tú misma persona es el resultado de un sueño. Un día tus padres soñaron con tener un hijo y naciste tú. La computadora que usas, el Internet, la energía eléctrica, Planeta de Mujeres, la ropa que traes puesta, la cama… Continue

Added by Karina Guerra on June 13, 2009 at 12:30am — 2 Comments

Administrator Forgive the hurts

Forgive the hurts (by HigherAwareness.com) "Forgiveness will never fail to free you." -- Jerrold Mundis How do we forgive when we’re angry and hurt? As a first step, we can be willing to truly feel our anger and hurt. Honouring our feelings by being fully present with them helps to release the feelings themselves. And it helps to remember that people only hurt others when they themselves are in pain. When we can recognize the other person’s suffering, our heart can open in comp… Continue

Added by Administrator on June 9, 2009 at 11:23am — 2 Comments

Administrator La Fuerza de las Palabras

Encontré este excelente video en You Tube, se los recomiendo! Les transcribo el texto de referencia... "El uso que hacemos del lenguaje es una forma de comportamiento. Y lo tenemos bien aprendido. Los niños, desde pequeños, incluso antes de saber contar o narrar algo, son capaces, de un modo particular, de pedir las cosas. En esta CAVERNA, reflexionamos sobre la descortesía y la violencia verbal, sobre el daño o el placer que puede suponer para las personas utilizar una expresión en vez de otr… Continue

Added by Administrator on May 25, 2009 at 11:05am — No Comments

Mariana Speaking of scammers and abusers...

This is to inform all of you I have banned this Lavone Pearson person who was inviting everyone to chat on an adult webcam... weirdos...! Continue

Added by Mariana on May 21, 2009 at 8:36pm — 4 Comments

Mariana Cómo detener a un abusador

Hay varias herramientas que las víctimas de abuso puede utilizar para romper el ciclo del abuso emocional y detener a un abusador. El Dr. George Simon sugiere las siguientes estrategias... - No aceptar excusas ante conductas inadecuadas - Juzgar las acciones en lugar de las intenciones o promesas - Responsabilizar al abusador por lo que hace y dice a través de una comunicación directa (haga preguntas directas y exija respuestas directas) - No dejarse engañar por las maniobras de distracción o… Continue

Added by Mariana on May 1, 2009 at 7:40pm — No Comments

Mariana Empowerment Tools

Dr. George Simon has written a series of empowerment tools to protect ourselves from abusers. The last one he posted was about "Personal Empowerment: Knowing Yourself and Your Strengths, Weaknesses and Needs" At some point it says something I share with him, knowledge is power... check the whole thread here: http://counsellingresource.com/features/2009/04/30/empowerment-tools-knowing-yourself/… Continue

Added by Mariana on April 30, 2009 at 9:25pm — No Comments

Mariana FOCUS

What do we focus on? If we keep focusing on the abuser, then we leave little time and energy to focus on ourselves as victims of abuse. Abusers know exactly what to say to make the victim feel responsible for something they are not. They aim to confuse people so they can keep control of the victim and the whole situation. If we focus on them, we might fall in this place where we will spend our entire lives speaking about the abuser, which is exactly what abusers want. We are empowering… Continue

Added by Mariana on April 27, 2009 at 11:00am — No Comments

Mariana Para los que hablan español

Les doy la bienvenida a todos los miembros nuevos de habla hispana. Si bien muchas de las discusiones del foro y muchos de los blogs están escritos en inglés, no duden en iniciar discusiones o blogs en español. Espero que encuentren aquí mucha información útil. Cualquier inquietud que tengan, no duden en consultarme. Les recomiendo comenzar con la lectura de los artículos del Dr. Carver, excelente material. Los artículos están en español e inglés en el grupo del Dr. Carver,… Continue

Added by Mariana on April 23, 2009 at 1:00am — 2 Comments

Mariana Fight or Flight

Some time ago, I read a book called "Getting to Yes" by Fisher, Ury, and Patton. It's basically a book on negotiation techniques used for business purposes, but it helped me a lot in my personal life. I am a firm believer of the things I stand for. Hence, I tend to defend my views till the bitter end. My approach to solving problems was rather fight than flight. On top of it, when I was born (November the 20th, 1962), my mom asked an "astrologist" to draw my birth chart and they found that I ha… Continue

Added by Mariana on April 20, 2009 at 1:00pm — 4 Comments

Administrator Free Personality Test

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp Check your personality type. Continue

Added by Administrator on April 14, 2009 at 10:25pm — 2 Comments

Nancy Helpful Books

I recommend Facing Codependence and Facing Love Addiction both by Pia Mellody. They helped me immensely during different stages of my journey Continue

Added by Nancy on April 4, 2009 at 9:46am — 10 Comments

Mariana Movies - Películas

There are several films that show the problem of emotional abuse. Here are some of them, you can see the trailers on YouTube or their respective main siltes, and some of these films are available for free (full film) at a website called http://www.peli… Continue

Added by Mariana on April 3, 2009 at 2:09pm — 3 Comments

Mariana Scammers - Estafadores

English Version - (Versión en español a continuación de la versión en inglés)

Scammers use the Internet to scam people. Sociopaths, con artists, etc., abound on-line these days. Their modus operandi is simple, they appear lovely and genuine to the eyes of others, while they are tru… Continue

Added by Mariana on March 31, 2009 at 11:45am — 7 Comments

Mariana In Sheep's Clothing

A book I highly recommend!

Dr. George Simon is the leading expert on manipulators and other distu… Continue

Added by Mariana on March 26, 2009 at 11:30pm — No Comments

Abelia EL ENEAGRAMA: Un puente hacia nuestro interior...

Se podría decir que el Eneagrama es un camino de autoconocimiento. Este sistema es solo un medio, una herramienta, que puede ser utilizado por cualquier persona con deseos de conocerse y mejorar, independientemente de sus creencias religiosas, ya que no es una doctrina ni está alineado con alguna doctrina, religión o dogma. Los orígenes del eneagrama son antiquísimos y poco… Continue

Added by Abelia on February 25, 2009 at 2:12am — 1 Comment

Abelia Mecanismos de Defensa: “El mecanismo de defensa es una estrategia de seguridad que construye la personalidad para no quebrarse. Es la armadura con la cual nos movemos en la vida“

La Falta de autorrespeto: En su libro ‘El Niño Feliz’, Dorothy Corkille Briggs nos da ciertas pautas para comprender los mecanismos que utiliza una persona para defenderse en la vida, y cual puede ser el origen de estos mecanismos. “En sus esfuerzos por agradarse a sí mismo, todo niño se esfuerza por obtener aprobación y trabaja incansablemente para desarrollar habilidades que eliminen sus incapacidades.… Continue

Added by Abelia on February 25, 2009 at 2:07am — 2 Comments

Abelia La fuerza curativa de la ecología interior

por Leonardo Boff En tiempos de crisis como el nuestro buscamos fuentes de inspiración allí donde se encuentren Una de ellas es la ecología interior. Para evaluar su importancia debemos concienciarnos de que nuestra relación con la Tierra, por lo menos en los últimos siglos, está basada en falsas premisas éticas y espirituales: antropocent… Continue

Added by Abelia on February 25, 2009 at 2:02am — 1 Comment

Administrator 9 Ways That Humor Heals

9 Ways That Humor Heals By Therese J. Borchard February 17, 2009 Of all my tools to combat depression and negativity, humor is by far the most fun. And just like mastering the craft of writing, I’m finding that the longer I practice laughing at life—and especially its frustra… Continue

Added by Administrator on February 18, 2009 at 6:41pm — 4 Comments

Administrator 13 Signs of Burnout and How To Help You Avoid It

13 Signs of Burnout and How To Help You Avoid It So how do you know if you, a loved one, or someone who reports to you is suffering from burnout? Here are the early warning signs. Chronic fatigue - exhaustion, tiredness, a sense of being physically run down… Continue

Added by Administrator on February 15, 2009 at 5:30pm — 2 Comments

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Latest Activity

pjay replied to Lola's discussion 'Guilt Tripping..'21 hours ago
very good, lola. we spend way too much time 'feeling bad' for the sake of others. when we don't, it does not mean that we do not care. i like this statement: " if you do not respect yourself, you can't expect anyone else to either."
A video by pjay was featuredyesterday
helping to heal through PLAY
abuse takes so much of this away from our lives
A discussion started by Lola was featuredyesterday
Guilt Tripping..
Great article.!! http://www.isnare.com/?aid=100465&ca=Womens+Interest
Lola added a discussionyesterday
Guilt Tripping..
Great article.!! http://www.isnare.com/?aid=100465&ca=Womens+Interest
pjay added a videoon Saturday
helping to heal through PLAY
Mariana replied to pjay's discussion 'michael jackson's death'on Wednesday
I agree with you, Lola. Abusive parents can leave deep wounds that will impact a child's functioning in adult life. Thanks for the links, they are very interesting!
Lola replied to pjay's discussion 'michael jackson's death'on Wednesday
I thought this was interesting, on the subject of FOOs. ""Our relationships within our family of origin are the most powerful ones in our lives. Yet for many of us, they became contaminated and filled with tensions. We have often been shaped and ...
Lola replied to pjay's discussion 'michael jackson's death'June 30
There is an expression: "the child is father of the man". Naturally, our childhood and infancy is what configures us, totally and completely. I greatly believe in the psychodynamic approach in psychology. Sure, other factors may play some part, bu...

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Created by Administrator Aug 12, 2008 at 11:19pm. Last updated by Mariana Apr 27.

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